Ever since a visit to Abbey Gardens, Tresco I have wanted, nay lusted after, a Cyathea medullaris, or the Black Tree Fern, the goth of tree ferns. Tall, elegant with a trunk of midnight, the kind of plant one of those eversotrendy vampires would have in their garden. So when I saw this close relative Cyathea cooperi “Brentwood” on the website of those fine chaps at Tropical Britain, to paraphrase those poor misunderstood Borg, “resistance was futile”. On reflection that would make a perfect TB catchphrase. This fern is no poor substitute, although tender and today transported to Costa del Greenhouse, it is as dear to my heart as that brash medullaris would have been. The new shoots curl sensuously into delicate lacy fronds and what is more are covered in fur! Only a heartless monster would not want to adopt this fern, take it home and give it a lovely life.